BREAST BIOPSY

Got the news about three weeks ago all women dread. "You need further mammography."

Minute clarifications in my right breast were found many years ago. A biopsy was recommenced. I did a lot of research and spoke with women who had had surgical biopsy and those who had had sterotactic biopsy. Those whose biopsy had turned out to be cancerous and those whose had turned out beign.

I concluded that a sterotactic biopsy was the way to go and was sent by my radiologist in Ventura, CA to Sansum Clinic in Santa Barbara. I was on the table, marked with black marking pen so the radiologist could guide the needle to the right spot, the radiologist at my side with needle in hand. She left the room, puzzling me. When she returned she said, "If I were you, I wouldn't have this done. The clarifications are too small and I cannot guarantee I can get them." She recommended that I have mammograms every six months to be sure there were no changes. I did this religiously for several years. There were no changes and we cut back to yearly mammograms

This year was different and I was referred to the Women's Clinic at the large Intermountain Health campus in Murray, Utah. The new x-rays showed the changes. With anxiety under control, I met with Dr. Kendall and his technician Rebekka. I felt I was in competent hands with this team. Dr. Kendall said there was about a 15% chance that there was cancer and said that a sterotactic biopsy was recommended - de ja vous.

He explained the procedure and the advances in technology in the last 20 years. I asked who would be doing the surgery. He said one of a team of seven radiologists. I said that was not acceptable to me. I would not be operated on by someone I had never met. I had just gone through this strange doctor thing with my second melanoma surgery. That was resolved to my satisfaction because I was very assertive. Dr. Kendall asked if I was comfortable with him. I said yes. I was led to the schedulers small office and made an appointment for the following week.

The day of the procedure, Collie drove me to the early appointment. I arrived with more anxiety and many unanswered questions, including health coverage. The curt insurance person said she could not help me with that. Collie and I wondered what her function was. I thought the receptionist would assign a number - she was that impersonal. I decided not to go through with the procedure until I had more information and was led once again to the schedulers office where I was met by Dr. Kendall. He was kind and understanding about my need for more answers.

I felt better knowing that I had bought time. I found out that my insurance coverage was excellent, did some more investigation, relaxed and rescheduled for today, Monday June 4, after waiting for Dr. Kendall's June schedule. Collie was very supportive, and said, "I just don't know what to do for you." The man who wants to solve all problems thing. I told him that just being there was what I needed.

We arrived at the clinic this morning promptly for my 8:00 AM appointment. Miss Insurance and Miss Receptionist were still their charming selves, having difficulty getting away from their computers to make eye contact. I left Collie in the waiting room when an attendant led me to the small changing chamber. After I had stripped from the waste up, I  followed directions and put on a gown with the ties in front, locked my bra and blouse in a locker and waited until I was fetched by Rebekka.

She led me to the prep room where I sat in a chair. Rebekka carefully gave me a step by step explanation of the entire procedure. She said that a small titanium clip would be permanently left in my breast as a marker in case cancer was found. This marker would guide the surgeon  to the exact spot. I signed permission to proceed. Dr Kendall came in, greeted me with a warm hand shake and reviewed how things would work. He said the entire procedure would take about 8 minutes.

I was led into the room where the surgery would take place, climbed a ladder to the table, was instructed to lie on my stomach with my right breast hanging through the hole, turn my head to the left, right arm at my side, left arm curved at the elbow. Was I comfortable? No. The thin pillow for my head was quite hard and I asked for another one. Request immediately granted. My scoliosis did not like these uncomfortable surfaces and angles.I sucked it up and tried to relax with some yoga breathing. Rebekka suggested that I take myself to my favorite location, a skill I had learned and used many times. I found it difficult now and became very emotional, though I did not let the tears show. I felt an overwhelming sense of regret, one of a couple of feelings I try very hard not to live with for long, along with anger and jealousy. Gads, I am so human.

Another x-ray was taken to determine the right path for the needle that would suck up the clarifications, hopefully getting all those that had changed. Dr. Kendall said that the needle would go in about an inch. Rebekka applied a topical numbing agent and Dr. Kendall began, first injecting a fast acting and dissipating form of lidocane He kept checking to be sure I had no pain. All went well until suddenly a pain that felt like an electric shock speared my breast. I jumped  and probably screamed. He asked what I had felt and then explained that sometimes the pain med followed a path that was not the same as the needle. He made an adjustment and I had no more pain. What happened from that point is a little fuzzy, but the clip was inserted and there was a loud popping sound, I think the vacuuming of the clarifications. And, the procedure was over.

I was led back to the original room where I continued reading the article by Joel Stein in the latest Time about How to Die. Joe; explained how he had become his parents death panel during their last years. Ironic.

I was given another mammogram and as I bared my right breast once again, Rebekka pointed out a strange discoloration she had not seen before. My instinct told me that it was probably an allergy to the pain med. I seem to develop more and more allergies. I cannot tolerate any bandage for more that a few hours. She and Dr. Kendall decided that they would use a liquid bandage to seal the small hole in my breast. Rebekka showed me the mammogram and pointed out the area that had held the troublesome clarifications as well as the titanium clip. I now join so many of my generation whose bodies are becoming bionic. I was assured that I would not trip off airport security systems.

I was told I would have little if any pain, perhaps some soreness and brusing, no swimming for a week (my favorite form of exercise), and no exercise for a day. Dr. Kendall confirmed that the strange blotches were probably from the pain med and to call if they did not disappear within 24 hours. I left with a ,pderm ice pack that contains no ice. Cold is activated upon squeezing. I was alergic to it and a day later had an angry red square imprint on my breast for the pack.


Back in the waiting room I warned Collie that I would most likely be emotional for a time. I have found that my men are mostly helpless when it comes to their wife's emotions. I told him that I just wanted to be comforted. I would take care of the emotions. And I am, by writing about this experience.

Now is the hard part, waiting for the results, hoping for the best and preparing mentally for the worst. I have been here several time in my life. I can handle it.